pride.

I’ll admit that something I struggle with is pride. So often I’ll go through the day, crossing things off my mental to-do list, patting myself on the back for making it through certain situations or accomplishing things, that I forget to really give credit where credit is due. Without Him, my Savior, I am nothing. I can do nothing. I would be nothing. I tend to get caught up in the day to day living that I so often make it through the day and try to remember if I even prayed before I ate lunch. I’ll get greedy over “my time” and not spend time reading my Bible or talking to God, the creator of time. I forget that He’s the one who makes the minutes happen and gives me another hour to live. Something great will happen in my ministry – a child who “got it” or good attendance at an event and quickly I will think that “I did good or worked hard for it.” I forget that God gives me ths talents and resources to do what I can accomplish. He moves in the hearts of individuals. I am nothing without Him. My prayer is “God make me less and help me to see You more.” I want to daily know that I am nothing without the grace and life of my Savior.

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thirsting…

I love the picture spiritually of thirsting. I don’t know why, but it is something I can totally relate to. I go through seasons where I am content with being complacent. But then other seasons, like the one I’m entering into righ tnow in my life, I can feel myself thirsting for God. A true yearning to know Him intimately, to need Him, to run to Him. I think the heavier the complacent patch we go through, the further we travel from Him, the more apparent the thirst is.

Unfortunately, one thing I have to work on is when I thirst for God, I scan my bookshelves looking for just the right book to inspire me. A book written by a great author to teach and convict me. Why don’t I just pick up my BIble instead and read from THE Author? In thr thirst, the Word of God is the quenching water. It nourishes, soothes, and saturates our soul.

 

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Rough ministry patch

It’s been kind of a rough ministry patch the past month or so. I’ve been totally swamped busy, but today I was realizing that even more so than busy with a to-do list a mile long, I’ve been heavy with the hurts of those close to me.

Within the past month we’ve had a wonderful ministry friends suffer a miscarriage, a dear friend lose his youth ministry job, and close ministry friends deliver a baby 7 weeks prematurely that has been in ICU for a week (so far). Today I was actually questioning God, seeing that all these friends are in ministry, as to why it was happening.

I am a great believer that when adversity strikes, it usually means that God is gearing up to do something BIG and Satan is trying to attack. I have felt it in my own life, I have seen it in the lives of others. But this type of pain I’m seeing is a movement of God, trying to show something, grow us, teach us, mold us, and to bring us to Him through it. It could be Satan attacking too – trying to test the resolve, the steadfastness.

Whatever the reason for the suffering in the lives of these closest to us, it has made for a few rough ministry weeks. Ever just feel so heavy and burdened for those you love? I do. But its a feeling I don’t want to lose either – compassion, love, concern. I want my heart broken with the things that break God’s and I know that these things do.

I don’t even know the point of this post! But just felt the rambling thoughts… 

 

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